"This Is A Good One" by Billy Von B.
Well, it's Saturday afternoon and my brothers have left for the weekend, so that leaves just me and you. I wanted to write something cool and clever for you but gee, I'm a little bit tired after last night. No, don't bother asking what I was doing last night because I can't tell you. I will say what I wasn't doing, though. I wasn't up on Brokeback Mountain having a little diddle with my cowboy buddies. Heck, no! (Not that there's anything wrong with that, mind you). I can say that part of the time I was checking out some videos on the internet about the use of greenscreens to phony up the 911 video footage we all saw and took at face value. Well, I'll be darned if the information contained in the following Newsletter I am posting here isn't RIGHT ON!
I came across this little gem a while ago but hesitated to post it before this. I really don't want to make light of what happened on 11-22-63 or 9-11-01 but I feel I should post this. It shows that others are not buying into the official government versions of these major conspiracies against our freedom and way of life, so I am posting this piece of political satire. After all, nothing can be worse than the way our so-called leaders have been treating us for many years. Whatever method it takes to expose these criminals and reveal the truth will have to do.
"ALL ABOUT BULLSHIT"
The Newsletter For Clear Thinkers
"Do you swear to tell the bullshit, the whole bullshit and nothing but the bullshit, so help you, Goddy?"
"Yes, we do!!"
NEWSFLASH!!
WASHINGTON, D. C. (BNS) (Bullshit New Service) Senator Arlo Spectacle, Republican from Pennsylvania, one of the perpetrators of the BULLSHIT SINGLE BULLET THEORY in the inside job assassination of President John F. Kennedy on November 22, 1963 was found unconscious yesterday on the floor of the Senate.
Doctors at Walter Reed Medical Center Hospital were overheard by this reporter to say, "a single bullet fired by a Level 3 Sleeper entered Spectacle's asshole, travelled through his scrotum and took out his nutsack containing only one ball. It then took a 180 degree turn, re-entered his body through his now oversized asshole and exited through his brain.
Spectacle is, however, expected to make a full recovery - remaining just as braindead as before. Doctors credited his more than remarkable recovery to an overabundance of reptilian genes and gorilla blood.
MORE 911 WOES FOR PLANNERS OF BULLSHIT WAR ON TERRORISM
NEW YORK, N. Y. (BNS (Bullshit News Service) The Pentagon Planners who conspired, plotted and planned the destruction of the World Trade Center Twin Towers and fooled most of the populace into thinking a bunch of camel-riding sand-nigerians, led by U. S. A. AMA OSAMA bin Llama, did it with cell phones, credit cards and hijacked aircraft, were arrested and taken into custody by members of the NYPD's elite B.O.S.S. (Bossy) Unit, led by legendary Detective, Dickie O'Day.
Also arrested were thirty members of a military Special Operations Team, who admitted to planting more than two thousand Demon Fire Mortars at key structural stress points in both buildings in order to cause an implosion of the twin towers.
"It was done over a two-year period," said Marine Colonel O. North, the team's commanding officer. "We were disguised as telephone repairmen, just like we were in Oklahoma City. It's an almost perfect cover for this kind of operation," North bragged.
"Nobody EVER challenged us! Yuh, yuh, yuh, FUCKHEADS!" North continued, "We detonated them suckers 'bout an hour after them missiles hit the buildings! It weren't no aircraft like the news shills was showing on TV. Din't yuh ever hear of green screens? Heck, NOBODY seen no planes hit them towers like they thought they did in real time! We fooled 'em all!
"What they seen on TV was doctored phony video footage of planes hitting the twin towers! It was SUPERIMPOSED over real background footage of the New York City skyline! If yuh look close, yuh notice that the BACKGROUND IS MOVING BUT THE FOREGROUND IS STATIONARY! The other thing is, the plane most people thought they saw goes, 'BLOOEY' into the building - just like melted butter!
"That's impossible, yuh dummies! A real plane would have exploded on impact and parts of the wreckage would have scattered all over the outside and rained down onto the streets! Haven't you wondered why there was NEVER ANY SOUND heard in the phony footage shown continuously all day? They added sound later but you can tell it's PHONY! By the way, we used our secret Global Hawk Anti-hijack System to hijack the real planes and divert them elsewhere."
The smirking North continued, "We planted them mortars and then remotely activated them from a ship in New York Harbor! Only problem was, we detonated the second tower first, but nobody said too much about it. Dummies!"
Detective O'Day, who led most of the investigation which resulted in the arrest of these bullshit scumbags, said that the major breakthrough in the case came one morning during a breakfast meeting at a pancake joint.
"This big fat black woman named Aunt Jamima, who had a bandana wrapped around her head, was screaming at a lizard-nosed weasel named Georgie-Boy in the booth behind us; something about, 'how dare he use the pancaked-down-on-itself bullshit theory story to explain how the towers crumbled into dust?'
"You Skull & Bones, mother-fuckah!" she screamed. "You honky mother-fuckah! You lizard mother-fuckah! You nigga mother-fuckah! What the fuck be wrong wit you?
"Pancakes mah biggest seller, you candy-assed mother-fuckah! Why you din't use the waffle-down-on-itself bullshit theory story, mother-fuckah? Why you gotta fuck up mah pancake bidness?"
"We knew we had our mutts at that point," said O'Day. "The rest was just follow-up and routine undercover detective work."
When asked how he felt about cracking one of the biggest cases of this century, O'Day answered, "When I told Rudy we had cracked the case, he took the cub scout's little dick out of his mouth and yelled, 'Oh, rats! Now I won't get to be SEE-EYE-AY Director!'
"I sold this info to HBO and they used it on a later episode of The Sopranos." O'Day added, "This case is nothing, compared to what we're working on now, but I can say no more. You'll just have to wait and see, that's all."
When pressed and asked if he could just give this reporter a bit of a hint, he said, "Well, it's bigger than a breadbox but smaller than Missus Georgie-Boy's cunny!" (Hey! If Clint can use it in one of his movies and win an academy award with the word, then I feel justified).
I came across this little gem a while ago but hesitated to post it before this. I really don't want to make light of what happened on 11-22-63 or 9-11-01 but I feel I should post this. It shows that others are not buying into the official government versions of these major conspiracies against our freedom and way of life, so I am posting this piece of political satire. After all, nothing can be worse than the way our so-called leaders have been treating us for many years. Whatever method it takes to expose these criminals and reveal the truth will have to do.
"ALL ABOUT BULLSHIT"
The Newsletter For Clear Thinkers
"Do you swear to tell the bullshit, the whole bullshit and nothing but the bullshit, so help you, Goddy?"
"Yes, we do!!"
NEWSFLASH!!
WASHINGTON, D. C. (BNS) (Bullshit New Service) Senator Arlo Spectacle, Republican from Pennsylvania, one of the perpetrators of the BULLSHIT SINGLE BULLET THEORY in the inside job assassination of President John F. Kennedy on November 22, 1963 was found unconscious yesterday on the floor of the Senate.
Doctors at Walter Reed Medical Center Hospital were overheard by this reporter to say, "a single bullet fired by a Level 3 Sleeper entered Spectacle's asshole, travelled through his scrotum and took out his nutsack containing only one ball. It then took a 180 degree turn, re-entered his body through his now oversized asshole and exited through his brain.
Spectacle is, however, expected to make a full recovery - remaining just as braindead as before. Doctors credited his more than remarkable recovery to an overabundance of reptilian genes and gorilla blood.
MORE 911 WOES FOR PLANNERS OF BULLSHIT WAR ON TERRORISM
NEW YORK, N. Y. (BNS (Bullshit News Service) The Pentagon Planners who conspired, plotted and planned the destruction of the World Trade Center Twin Towers and fooled most of the populace into thinking a bunch of camel-riding sand-nigerians, led by U. S. A. AMA OSAMA bin Llama, did it with cell phones, credit cards and hijacked aircraft, were arrested and taken into custody by members of the NYPD's elite B.O.S.S. (Bossy) Unit, led by legendary Detective, Dickie O'Day.
Also arrested were thirty members of a military Special Operations Team, who admitted to planting more than two thousand Demon Fire Mortars at key structural stress points in both buildings in order to cause an implosion of the twin towers.
"It was done over a two-year period," said Marine Colonel O. North, the team's commanding officer. "We were disguised as telephone repairmen, just like we were in Oklahoma City. It's an almost perfect cover for this kind of operation," North bragged.
"Nobody EVER challenged us! Yuh, yuh, yuh, FUCKHEADS!" North continued, "We detonated them suckers 'bout an hour after them missiles hit the buildings! It weren't no aircraft like the news shills was showing on TV. Din't yuh ever hear of green screens? Heck, NOBODY seen no planes hit them towers like they thought they did in real time! We fooled 'em all!
"What they seen on TV was doctored phony video footage of planes hitting the twin towers! It was SUPERIMPOSED over real background footage of the New York City skyline! If yuh look close, yuh notice that the BACKGROUND IS MOVING BUT THE FOREGROUND IS STATIONARY! The other thing is, the plane most people thought they saw goes, 'BLOOEY' into the building - just like melted butter!
"That's impossible, yuh dummies! A real plane would have exploded on impact and parts of the wreckage would have scattered all over the outside and rained down onto the streets! Haven't you wondered why there was NEVER ANY SOUND heard in the phony footage shown continuously all day? They added sound later but you can tell it's PHONY! By the way, we used our secret Global Hawk Anti-hijack System to hijack the real planes and divert them elsewhere."
The smirking North continued, "We planted them mortars and then remotely activated them from a ship in New York Harbor! Only problem was, we detonated the second tower first, but nobody said too much about it. Dummies!"
Detective O'Day, who led most of the investigation which resulted in the arrest of these bullshit scumbags, said that the major breakthrough in the case came one morning during a breakfast meeting at a pancake joint.
"This big fat black woman named Aunt Jamima, who had a bandana wrapped around her head, was screaming at a lizard-nosed weasel named Georgie-Boy in the booth behind us; something about, 'how dare he use the pancaked-down-on-itself bullshit theory story to explain how the towers crumbled into dust?'
"You Skull & Bones, mother-fuckah!" she screamed. "You honky mother-fuckah! You lizard mother-fuckah! You nigga mother-fuckah! What the fuck be wrong wit you?
"Pancakes mah biggest seller, you candy-assed mother-fuckah! Why you din't use the waffle-down-on-itself bullshit theory story, mother-fuckah? Why you gotta fuck up mah pancake bidness?"
"We knew we had our mutts at that point," said O'Day. "The rest was just follow-up and routine undercover detective work."
When asked how he felt about cracking one of the biggest cases of this century, O'Day answered, "When I told Rudy we had cracked the case, he took the cub scout's little dick out of his mouth and yelled, 'Oh, rats! Now I won't get to be SEE-EYE-AY Director!'
"I sold this info to HBO and they used it on a later episode of The Sopranos." O'Day added, "This case is nothing, compared to what we're working on now, but I can say no more. You'll just have to wait and see, that's all."
When pressed and asked if he could just give this reporter a bit of a hint, he said, "Well, it's bigger than a breadbox but smaller than Missus Georgie-Boy's cunny!" (Hey! If Clint can use it in one of his movies and win an academy award with the word, then I feel justified).
Labels: Republican from PennsylvaniaSenator, Senator Arlo Spectacle
posted by Dick Von Blogger at 3:55 PM
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