Dick Von Blogger's E-News & Rants of the Day!: "WEEKLY RECAP"
Dick Von Blogger's E-News & Rants of the Day!:
"THE RANT'S WEEKLY RECAP" FRIDAY 4/20/06"
Hidee Ho, Yo! What up? Dirk Von Blogger, at your service. I be the brother of Dick Von Blogger, the host of the "Dick Von Blogger's E-News & Rants Of The Day" blog here at the DVB blog site. Poor old Dick had a rough week what with all of his ranting and raving. It does take a lot out of you, it do. Ranting, that is. I know, I talk-a kind-a funny but I just learn-a da English, yah?
Anyway, Dick is spending a little quality time in his custom, made-to-order 12x12 padded room at the old ESTATE.
What Estate, you ask? Oh, no. We can not-a tell ya. Dick is already starting to become a little too well known, if ya know what I mean. It's getting harder and harder to keep the MOPERS, MUTTS, GEEKS and GAWKERS off the property, yah? Yah, Bra'. We did want to say that, overall - it was a GOOD week.
There were many many responses to Dick's blogs and emails to various members of HIGH SOCIETY this week. Good responses, too. He (Dick) received a personal email from the Congressman, who did express his own disappointment with HIMSELF for not being on top of these matters sooner and for being a failure at representation of a constituent. Excellent, excellent.
Only two fly-overs by inmarked military-style helicopters that appeared to be mapping out the layout of THE ESTATE for possible future meddling. Don't worry, we know. JUST SAY NO! A suspicious vehicle or two was last seen cruising backwards on the road clearly marked, "PRIVATE ROAD - NO TRESSPASSING - AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY - PATROLLED BY ARMED SECURITY GUARDS ACCOMPANIED BY VICIOUS ATTACK DOGS - ELECTRONIC SECURITY SYSTEMS IN PLACE - PREMISES UNDER SURVEILLANCE BY HIDING DOWN BOGEYMEN AND CANDID CAMERAS - DANGER - LEVEL FIVE SLEEPERS ACTIVATED - THESE PREMISES RESTRICTED TO - DICK VON BLOGGER - DIRK VON BLOGGER - BILLY VON BLOGGER - MARY THE SECRETARY - OR ANYONE ELSE THE BOYS SAY IS AUTHORIZED!"
What can you do? Some people just don't pay attention to signs.
I was recently asked by a lovely young woman if I was Dick Von Blogger's brother.
"Why do you ask?" I asked.
"Well, you look a lot like him," she replied.
"Do I look like a Dick to you?" I asked with a bit of feined indignation.
She seemed a little started by the question. "Why, no, Dirk," she answered meekly. "I.., didn't mean..., I mean, Dick is very handsome, he is. I wasn't implying..., that you LOOK like a DICK or, that you ACT like a DICK..., or, that you ARE a DICK! Maybe a MICK but certainly not a DICK!"
"Oh, okay," I said, just a bit too smugly.
"But since the SUBJECT'S come up, why don't you take me out tonight, buy me a nice DINNER, get me DRUNK and then you can HAVE AT ME ALL YOU WANT!" She said, sweetly as she batted her eyelashes.
Ah, the perk's of being DICK VON BLOGGER'S BROTHER.
Yup, not a bad week at all, I'd say. Dirk signing off. Talk to ya, soon.
"THE RANT'S WEEKLY RECAP" FRIDAY 4/20/06"
Hidee Ho, Yo! What up? Dirk Von Blogger, at your service. I be the brother of Dick Von Blogger, the host of the "Dick Von Blogger's E-News & Rants Of The Day" blog here at the DVB blog site. Poor old Dick had a rough week what with all of his ranting and raving. It does take a lot out of you, it do. Ranting, that is. I know, I talk-a kind-a funny but I just learn-a da English, yah?
Anyway, Dick is spending a little quality time in his custom, made-to-order 12x12 padded room at the old ESTATE.
What Estate, you ask? Oh, no. We can not-a tell ya. Dick is already starting to become a little too well known, if ya know what I mean. It's getting harder and harder to keep the MOPERS, MUTTS, GEEKS and GAWKERS off the property, yah? Yah, Bra'. We did want to say that, overall - it was a GOOD week.
There were many many responses to Dick's blogs and emails to various members of HIGH SOCIETY this week. Good responses, too. He (Dick) received a personal email from the Congressman, who did express his own disappointment with HIMSELF for not being on top of these matters sooner and for being a failure at representation of a constituent. Excellent, excellent.
Only two fly-overs by inmarked military-style helicopters that appeared to be mapping out the layout of THE ESTATE for possible future meddling. Don't worry, we know. JUST SAY NO! A suspicious vehicle or two was last seen cruising backwards on the road clearly marked, "PRIVATE ROAD - NO TRESSPASSING - AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY - PATROLLED BY ARMED SECURITY GUARDS ACCOMPANIED BY VICIOUS ATTACK DOGS - ELECTRONIC SECURITY SYSTEMS IN PLACE - PREMISES UNDER SURVEILLANCE BY HIDING DOWN BOGEYMEN AND CANDID CAMERAS - DANGER - LEVEL FIVE SLEEPERS ACTIVATED - THESE PREMISES RESTRICTED TO - DICK VON BLOGGER - DIRK VON BLOGGER - BILLY VON BLOGGER - MARY THE SECRETARY - OR ANYONE ELSE THE BOYS SAY IS AUTHORIZED!"
What can you do? Some people just don't pay attention to signs.
I was recently asked by a lovely young woman if I was Dick Von Blogger's brother.
"Why do you ask?" I asked.
"Well, you look a lot like him," she replied.
"Do I look like a Dick to you?" I asked with a bit of feined indignation.
She seemed a little started by the question. "Why, no, Dirk," she answered meekly. "I.., didn't mean..., I mean, Dick is very handsome, he is. I wasn't implying..., that you LOOK like a DICK or, that you ACT like a DICK..., or, that you ARE a DICK! Maybe a MICK but certainly not a DICK!"
"Oh, okay," I said, just a bit too smugly.
"But since the SUBJECT'S come up, why don't you take me out tonight, buy me a nice DINNER, get me DRUNK and then you can HAVE AT ME ALL YOU WANT!" She said, sweetly as she batted her eyelashes.
Ah, the perk's of being DICK VON BLOGGER'S BROTHER.
Yup, not a bad week at all, I'd say. Dirk signing off. Talk to ya, soon.
posted by Dick Von Blogger at 7:56 PM
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